Agapo
by Tribal Shimmy
Summary: Sorry to keep you waiting so long and this is just a story of two long chapters. I hope you enjoy it. This story is dedicated to System 1988 who took the time to tell me I should be writing more.
1. Chapter 1

Alexander pushed his tired horse on to where a small group of his men stood around a corpse, one held a skin of water and murmured that he had been alive when they had found him. Darius. The man who had been king now lay upon the rocky ground, his lifeless eyes looking up in to the blue sky where an eagle soared effortlessly, its cry echoing across the barren land. The Great King, the man who had everything, brought to this end. Unclipping his cloak, Alexander laid it gently over the man, then crouched down beside him and thought of what might have been.

OOXXOO

Philotas' laughter echoed around the crowded hall. Deep in his cups, he lay back upon his couch finding great amusement in something Leonnatus had said, embracing his friend warmly as tears rolled down his face.

Leonnatus shrugged his shoulders and grinned towards Alexander, shaking his head.

"He never could hold his wine," Ptolemy noted, slapping the thigh of Nicanor who slept beside him. "The brother passed out long ago."

"Ah, but we are celebrating, Ptolemy," Craterus declared, getting up, so that he could ruffle his friends curls, then hold his empty cup up to toast the king. "Philip led us to a great victory at Chaeronea, I would love to be in Athens now and hear what Demosthenes has to say, for I wager he has returned there with his tail between his legs."

"I went to Athens. Remember?" Alexander chided, laughing softly

Craterus thought for a moment. "Oh yes, you did. With the ashes of the dead." He noticed his empty cup and looked around for a servant to fill it, frowning as he saw her in the arms of Seleucus.

"We have every right to celebrate," smiled Leonnatus, " the whole of Pella can celebrate tonight, can toast our victorious return."

Alexander looked down and studied the wine in his full cup, feeling once again the anticipation of battle, seeing the Sacred Band before him and feeling the desire for victory flow through him. He took a sip of the wine, then lowered his cup as he remembered the komos his father lead amongst the dead, the drunken party then. A great victory for his father, though he had scarcely acknowledged that his son had defeated Thebes greatest strength. He had been glad to go to Athens, to get away if only for a short time.

Leonnatus nodded over to the other side of the hall, where you could just see Amyntas sitting with his companions, drinking and laughing. "You fought well, Alexander," he offered in praise, "but your cousin, the man who would be king, has nothing to celebrate, he almost got himself killed and a good man died to save him."

"A good man fighting for a lost cause," agreed Ptolemy, looking across the hall, "and now the sons will give him that unconditional loyalty and for what? Philip was right to take the throne look how worthless his nephew is, he'd have got us all killed had he ever been old enough to take the throne when his father died."

"We'd still all be minding our sheep, goats and horses," Perdiccas commented, sitting up to look over the hall.

"He'd have bowed to Athens," Leonnatus stated. "There would have been no battle".

"So Leandros and Hephaistion, will follow as their father did," Ptolemy shook his head.

Perdiccas, who had stepped over to sit by Alexander laughed to hear Ptolemy. "They say that Leandros loves Amyntas with slavish devotion, though it is unrequited, he beds the girls not the boys. Leandros has a wife, who they say, has never known her husband's company in bed."

"She is with child, and it is his, that's what I heard," Ptolemy said, giving Perdiccas a look to show how he hated gossip.

Seleucus let the servant go to serve the wine, she stayed close smiling at him, filling the cups of his friends, then frowning as she was called away by others further along the hall. Dancers span by the group, wearing flowers in their hair, laughing as they passed by, dancing to the beat of the music. Other laughter was heard around the room, everyone was celebrating.

"You will have your chance, Alexander," Craterus said, coming close so Alexander alone would hear it. "You father will not conquer all."

"Attalus is too close to him, they say my father will marry his niece."

"I suppose by 'they' you mean your mother," laughed Craterus, pulling his friend close and kissing his golden hair, "you listen to her too much".

Alexander smiled. "She says I never listen to her anymore."

Cleitus staggered over and rested his hand on Alexander's shoulder. "Are you brooding again?" he asked.

"Celebrating," laughed Ptolemy, raising his cup and nodding towards Nicanor and then Philotas.

"Parmenion should have sons who can hold their wine," Cleitus said, shaking his head, "but then the father is having trouble staying awake, having exhausted himself talking through the battle once more." He took a large drink of wine. "Still. Philip likes to hear it." He looked across the room, distracted for a moment. "Who is Hephaistion with?" he asked.

All those still sober enough looked over to see Leandros and Hephaistion sitting each side of Amyntas, his arms around the brothers.

"Hephaistion is not with anyone," Leonnatus said, grinning at Cleitus, laughing as the general began to stagger over in pursuit of his prey.

"I heard he was with Pallas," commented Perdiccas.

Ptolemy emptied his cup. "Hephaistion will have many, that's for sure, he has the looks of a god, just not the sense to follow the right man."

Perdiccas nudged Alexander. "Are you not drinking?"

A song was struck, Philip, staggering forward to sing a victory song, encouraged by all in the crowded hall, he raised his hands high and began to dance, joined by others and a komos was begun once more.

OOXXOO

Alexander rode out on Bucephalus just after dawn the next morning, while all in the palace slept off the excesses of the celebration.

It was a perfect summers morning, with a cloudless blue sky and he headed towards the mountains which overlooked the city, riding across the plain and then up in to the foothills, through woodland, along a goat track to a place where large rocks sat upon the grass, as if a god had crushed part of the mountain and the fragments had landed here.

There was a small brook, birds sang, the place was idyllic, a secret haunt found long ago, a place to come and be alone with your thoughts.

"You're late."

Alexander turned and saw Hephaistion, smiling to him. "And joy to you," he said, quickly dismounting. "Have you been here all night?"

Hephaistion laughed and took him in a warm embrace, looking in to his eyes before gently kissing his lips, laughing again as Alexander sought to deepen the kiss but returning it with equal passion.

"Leandros thinks I went with Pallas," Hephaistion said, when they finally parted. "Let him think it, for it buys me time with you, my Alexander."

Alexander embraced his lover tightly. "I am so sorry that you lost your father, I wanted to come and be with you but it was impossible to get away."

"Amyntas made a mistake," Hephaistion acknowledged. "My father saved him."

Alexander stepped back and put his hands on Hephaistion's shoulders. "Now is the time for you to give up any loyalty to Amyntas, so that we can be together."

"I would lose a brother as well as a father then," Hephaistion said. He pursed his lips and then smiled, reaching up to caress Alexander's face. "I never thought to have such feelings for anyone as I do for you, my Alexander. I take risks for you, for stolen moments with you and that is all it can ever be between us."

Wanting the contact, Alexander pulled Hephaistion close to him. "But if Amyntas challenged my father…"

"It would have happened sooner, it will not happen now, your father keeps him in comfort, his ambition would only ignite if anything happened to Philip."

"And who would you fight for, Hephaistion?"

Hephaistion shook his head. "I pray that your father lives to enjoy old age, to save me these choices."

Alexander breathed in the scent of Hephaistion, relished the sensation of Hephaistion's body against his and raised his hand to entwine his fingers in the silken locks then pulled back a little to lose himself in the lapis eyes. He was asking too many questions, he realised that, he was pushing him too much, but these brief moments were the only time he ever had to talk...and love. "It has been too long," he whispered.

Two nights before the battle they had managed to be alone for a short while, to speak briefly and to kiss, away from the camp where they had to act as if they hardly knew each other. Alexander knew his father would laugh to know of their relationship but that Amyntor and Amyntas would be displeased and there was a danger that Hephaistion would be sent away, far from Pella if they were found out.

Hephaistion bit his lip, looked deep in to Alexander's grey eyes and smiled. "Remember when we met?"

"As children? I remember."

"No, not then, we did not see each other for some years. I am thinking of when you had just returned from Mieza and I had been sent alone to Pella with a letter from Amyntas for the king. I think of that moment often, of how I met you, alone, in the hallway, as if the fates had planned it all. You never said a word and I just about managed to say a greeting."

"I wished you joy," Alexander insisted, then laughed softly. "No, I remember, the words would not come. I had never seen someone so handsome. "You found me out, later."

"You found me." Hephaistion kissed Alexander's lips. "Though I waited at the stables for such a long time before you appeared," he confessed.

Alexander tightened the embrace for a moment then led the way up a gentle slope to piece of level ground which had a carpet of grass. He kicked off his cavalry boots, unfastened his belt and pulled off his chiton then turned to see Hephaistion had done the same and was just in the act of pulling the chiton over his head. He laughed with happiness and lay down upon the grass, taking Hephaistion in his arms as he lay down beside him.

Giving in to their desire, they kissed while their hands reaquainted themselves with each others bodies which moved against each other, their legs entwined, they spoke murmured endearments, then because they could wait no longer they found release with each other but were still reluctant to break apart when they were both satiated.

"Be with me," breathed Alexander, kissing Hephaistion's brow.

Hephaistion sighed and kissed Alexander's lips, then trailed his fingers gently along Alexander's back. He said nothing.

Alexander swallowed down the words he might have spoken, choosing to give up the battle and accept what they had. He knew that Hephaistion was not so close to Leandros, this older brother was more the age of Amyntas, but he was loyal, and he had just lost his father, it was too soon.

"How long does Amyntas plan to stay at Pella?" he asked.

"Another couple of days and then he will return to Aegae."

"Two days?" Alexander sat up, pulling his knees up and wrapping his arms around them. He turned to look at Hephaistion who was temptation lying on the grass beside him. "Can you find an excuse to stay?"

"No, but I will try to come back, to bring any messages to your father." He smiled. "And I can be here tomorrow, I will find a way to be with you."

Alexander returned the smile and lay back down beside his love, running his hand along the muscled chest, feeling his desire grow as it always did when Hephaistion was near.

OOXXOO

Smiling, as he walked in to the palace, Alexander's head was full of images of the morning spent with Hephaistion, of all they had done and all that they had spoken of, wondering how long Hephaistion had stayed at their secret place after he had left, whether he too was back in Pella now and if so how far away he was. He knew his mother wanted to see him but decided to delay the moment as he wanted to savour the sweetness of his memories before he tasted the bitterness of his mother's words.

As he ran up the stairs that led towards his rooms he saw Amyntas, Leandros, Pallas and Thoas coming towards him.

"Joy to you, Alexander," Amyntas said, his eyes studying the man before him.

"Joy to you," Alexander replied, looking to his cousin, then to Leandros,who had Hephaistion's long hair but small brown eyes, those of the father, not the mother apparently. He nodded to Pallas, a pale youth, who tried to emulate his father, Thoas, but failed miserably. He knew Hephaistion had tried to help him and that is how the convenient rumours started that they were lovers. Pallas never disputed any allegation, it suited him to have people think he had such a lover. Thoas was a brute of a man, who kept the fire of Amyntas' ambition burning brightly.

Amyntas gave a false laugh. "And how is the man who would challenge me to the throne?"

"Well enough," Alexander replied.

Amyntas nodded. "Are you on your way to see your mother?" He turned and smiled at his companions.

"To see my father," Alexander lied, knowing Amyntas would hate his answer, but Amyntas laughed once more.

"He's still in his bed...with a girl to keep him company, Attalus' niece by all accounts. Perhaps your father will have another son, another boy to challenge, then you will have a taste of what I have had to swallow."

Before Alexander could answer, the sound of someone running through the palace were heard, then taking the steps two at a time. Alexander turned to see Hephaistion approach, his footsteps now faltering as he saw the group before him.

"We were wondering where you had got to," Amyntas said, signalling for Hephaistion to come to him, then wrapping his left arm around his waist when he did. With his right hand he pulled back Hephaistion's hair and kissed his cheek, while all the time his eyes stayed focussed on Alexander. "I think I see some jealousy, Alexander. Perhaps I have something that you want." With that he nipped Hephaistion's neck.

Hephaistion flinched and pulled back, looking to Alexander, silently urging him not to react.

"You have nothing I can't take," said Alexander and went to walk on but Thoas stepped out in to his path, only to be pulled back by Leandros who caught his arm and told him they were in the wrong place to cause trouble.

"Come, Thoas," called Amyntas, like you would call a dog to heel.

"What is he anyway?" Thoas muttered. "Son of an Epirot."

Alexander's hand went to his dagger. He would have killed them all, except for Hephaistion, and only for his sake had he not reacted, Amyntas was responsible for Amyntor's death, Alexander vowed that if any harm ever came to Hephaistion Amyntas would be a dead man.

He took a deep breath, a final look at Hephaistion and then made his way to his rooms.

OOXXOO

After one more meeting, one morning together, where Hephaistion wore Amyntas' mark upon his neck, Hephaistion left for Aegae with the rest. Alexander was able to watch him leave, having found a quiet balcony which looked over to the stables and then across the road which led from the city.

Hephaistion had looked over to the palace, as if he knew grey eyes focussed on him and unseen by the others he raised his hand in a farewell. He rode along with Leandros and Pallas, while Amyntas talked with Thoas, behind them was Amyntas' guard.

Alexander waited until they vanished from sight, then made his way to the gymnasium to spend the morning with his friends.

OOXXOO

The rumours about Philip and the newly named Eurydice soom became fact, as the king announced his wedding plans and Attalus grew in power, spreading rumours of his own that his niece was already with child.

Alexander retreated to the comfort of his mother's rooms where his concerns about a child taking his place matched those of his mother who feared the new bride, this love-match was a dangerous thing.

Soon the comfort went as his mother turned on him, encouraging him to marry, calling him a fool when he refused to. She railed at him constantly, always pushing for perfection, always talking badly of his father. So, he began to go to the one place he felt at peace, the place he shared with Hephaistion.

He would lie upon the grass, his eyes closed against the warm sun and think of the man he loved. The one good thing about the wedding was that Hephaistion would return.

OOXXOO

Amyntas left it late, not arriving at Pella until the eve of the wedding and then only Thoas and Pallas accompanied him. Alexander was seated by his father when he arrived, bowing low, explaining that Leandros and Hephaistion were at their family estate and would not be attending.

It was nothing to his father, ambassadors and guests filled the crowded hall, two less meant nothing, but to Alexander it caused bitter disappointment. He glared at Amyntas, inwardly blaming him, wondering if anything had happened, if they might have been seen together, if Hephaistion and his brother could still be sent for.

He excused himself early and sat upon his balcony drinking wine, until Apollo began to ride his chariot up in to the sky. Only then did he lie upon his bed and let sleep claim him and all too soon his servants were waking him, concerned he would be late.

His head ached.

As he bathed, Craterus and Ptolemy arrived, swapping glances with each other, sending away a servant who came with another cup of wine.

Craterus sat on the edge of the bath and massaged Alexander's shoulders, while Ptolemy organised his clothes and a large breakfast which Alexander did not have the stomach to eat. Nobody knew of his love for Hephaistion, it would be easy to tell two trusted friends but what would it win him? It would not bring Hephaistion here.

Allowing Craterus to rub him dry, he laughed to himself and shook his head, then moaned at the pain that caused. He was acting like a lovesick girl, like the gynis everyone called him. He would see Hephaistion again, soon enough, and there was nothing he could do about it now.

Seleucus and Perdiccas arrived, Leonnatus shortly after them and after his companions had cleared the breakfast table they went to join the wedding party.

As the day progressed Alexander found himself with dark thoughts. Eurydice's rounded belly, his father's obvious love for his bride and Attalus being so full of self-importance all grated on him. He looked over to Amyntas, who seemed to share his mood. The two of them were like competitiors at a race, waiting for it to begin, looking at each other, weighing up the others strengths and weaknesses. If Eurydice had a boy then Attalus would have a right to step forward and claim the throne, to join that race too.

Attalus stepped up now, holding his cup up high, then shouted out a toast. Alexander looked to his father who was well in to his cups, grinning broadly at the general.

"Let us toast to have a true Macedonian heir...from my niece, Eurydice," he shouted.

Alexander leapt up from his couch and threw his wine cup at Attalus, just missing his head. "And what does that make me? A bastard?"

Attalus threw his cup but it went wide, there was a roar from Philip and Alexander found himself encircled by his companions who pulled him back from going to attack.

Philip staggered to his feet and then got up on to his couch so he could be seen. "Alexander! You will apologise right now."

"You favour him over your son? A man who called me a bastard?" Alexander asked, outraged with his father.

"Alexander..." Craterus said, trying to soothe but failing in the attempt, not knowing what to say.

"You'll apologise. Right now," Philip screamed, looking around for a weapon and finding the sword which had cut the bread."

Not quite believing his father would harm him, Alexander made no move to step back, he looked to Attalus who was sneering at him, over to Amyntas who was laughing with delight. Resisting the pull of his companions to get him out of the hall, Alexander heard a clatter and turned to see his father had fallen, the sword sliding across the mosaic floor.

He had to leave before his father called the guard. Attalus had power, who knew how far his influence would go. He pointed to his father. "This is the man who would lead you in to Asia, and he can not even make it from one couch to the other."

With that he left, striding out of the hall, knowing he would have to leave, take his mother and head out to Epirus.

His companions all came with him until they were sure there was no longer any danger of Philip coming after them. Then not wanting to risk his friends safety, make them appear accomplices, he told them to head home and went on to the capital, Dodona, with his mother. He wondered what Hephaistion would think when he heard the news, wished he could send a letter, that he could just spend a moment in his arms to explain everything.

OOXXOO

He thought that he could bear his exile in the comfort of Dodona, to wait out the winter in good company but messages from Pella soon made him realise that it was impossible for him to stay.

Perhaps his father hoped that he would return, contrite, asking for forgiveness but he had too much pride for that and so against both his mother and uncle's advice he wrapped himself up in furs and headed in to the wilderness of Illyria with some trusted men who saw him as far as the safest village, where they left him.

Spending his time hunting and helping in the village time passed, and Alexander would find himself staring in to the fire at night and thinking of Hephaistion, picturing him before him, wrapping himself in fond memories. It seemed like a dream now, that he was ever with him and he wondered how he spent the winter, if he had cause to come to Pella, if he rode out to their secret place and thought of him.

He rembered the sneer from Attalus, the cruel remark and vowed revenge, then thought of Amyntas' laughter, he must have welcomed the chance to step back in to favour with the king. He would be spending more time at Pella now, Hephaistion would be there too.

As spring approached a welcome visitor arrived, Demaratus of Corinth who brought news that his father had agreed to be reconciled with his wayward heir. An apology would be required, but a private one, not before the court and not with Attalus present. His mother had chosen to remain in Epirus and sent a letter to say that he should be cautious on his return to Pella, that his father was not to be trusted at any time, that some god would seek to punish him for all the misery he had inflicted in his life.

Alexander burnt the letter on the fire and packed his things, going directly to Craterus' estate where he swapped his furs and skins for fine linen and a woollen chlamys and waited for his companions to arrive before riding back to Pella. He made sure he looked his finest, not wanting to appear to have suffered any hardship in his absence.

Philip had ridden out from Pella to meet him, no doubt having sent scouts out to look for his return. He came with Cleitus, Parmenion and Antipater, his guard and Amyntas who was flanked by Leandros and Hephaistion.

While his father was officially welcoming him home Alexander was distracted by the broad grin on Hephaistion's face. A cough from Antipater prompted him to reply and a glance to Hephaistion had him apologising there and then, he apologised for leaving as he did, for staying away so long and praised Demartus for repairing the damage done. Philip smiled and offered an embrace which Alexander gladly accepted holding on to the man hoping Hephaistion knew the apology was for him.

Philip joked with Alexander's companions that his expenditure at court would no doubt increase because they had returned to eat his food and drink his best wine and that was all the welcome back they had.

Alexander returned to the city, riding alongside his father, welcomed by crowds gathered to see his return.

OOXXOO

Alexander was told he would be dining with his father that night, with Parmenion and Antipater in attendance and Philotas and Craterus to spend his time with.

As he finished his bath and dried his hair with a towel, Craterus arrived, still laughing at the novelty of having his friend back in the palace at Pella. While he dressed, Craterus lay back on his bed, stretching out at the comfort of it and jokingly suggesting they should be lovers so he could spend his nights in luxury, though his room at the barracks was hardly Spartan.

Philotas arrived as Alexander tied his sandals, calling to a servant for some wine then refusing to sit, saying he was hungry and wanted to go and get dinner.

They made their way out of the rooms and along the hallway, turning left to head for a short flight of stairs that led to where the dinner would be held. As they turned they saw Hephaistion, waiting in an alcove at the top of the stairs. Alexander's heart leapt to see him, he must have taken a chance, in the hope of finding him making his way to the dinner alone.

"Are you lost, Hephaistion?" sneered Craterus.

Hephaistion did not respond but stepped back in to the shadows.

Philotas stepped forward, pulling away from Alexander as he attempted to hold him. "Amyntas' dog," he goaded, ignoring the fact he had been following at Alexander's heel. "Have you been sent to spy? Is your Master so troubled by Alexander's return?"

"There should be nothing between us," Hephaisiton replied, softly, his eyes fixed on Philotas. "Philip is still king. Is he not? The last I saw of him he looked well enough."

"Why you!" Craterus reached out for Hephaistion, grabbing at his chiton and pulling him away from the wall before slamming him back into it.

Hephaistion raised his fist and punched Craterus in the face, knocking him back on to the floor, leaving him with a bloody nose, then reached for his dagger as he saw Philotas reach for his.

Alexander gave a shout, an order for Philotas to back away, which reluctantly he did.

"Amyntas plans to kill your father," Craterus mumbled, holding his hand to his nose, checking if it was broken before wiping the blood away.

"He plans nothing of the sort," stated Hephaistion, looking to ensure Philotas sheathed his dagger before he did. Only then did he look to Alexander. "I don't think much of your friends," he said, before stepping past Craterus and making his way down the stairs.

Alexander frowned. Hephaistion had taken a chance and the fates had been cruel, two of his closest friends, coming to him, had not only lost him that opportunity but there had been needless fight but he hid a smile as he thought how well Hephaistion had handled himself, at the image in his mind of Craterus falling on his back, of the shock upon his face.

"Go wash your face, Craterus, you know where we will be," he said, shaking his head at Philotas. "He had every right to be where he was, Philotas, think twice next time, you never think things through."

He made his way down the stairs, almost mournful to have lost a chance to be with Hephaistion alone.

OOXXOO

Two days later the fates were kinder to him. Alexander went to the gymnasium and found the place deserted, except for Hephaistion just finishing his bath.

Without saying a word, Alexander pushed him back in to the darkened room and claimed his lips, realising as he kissed him that he had been away so long, he might be wrong to assume that Hephaistion would want him. Yet, his kiss was returned, the sweetest kiss followed, where their passion was expressed.

Breaking it, Alexander looked over his shoulder, and seeing no-one was there sought a darker place while he kicked off his boots and pulled his chiton over his head.

Hephaistion laughed, pulling him close. "No friends with you?" he asked, giving a brief kiss before embracing him again.

"And no-one else for you, Hephaistion?" asked Alexander, parting his lover's thighs, still oiled from the bath.

Sighing, Hephaistion moved against him, encouraging Alexander to slide between his legs, groaning softly as Alexander took him in his hand. "I missed you," he confessed. "There has been no other." He laughed again. "And this will not take long."

Alexander claimed another kiss, the very thought that Hephaistion had remained his, had stayed true, overwhelming him, they had little time before someone would arrive, he wanted to make it last, to savour all that he had missed, but instead he gave himself to his feelings, heightened as Hephaistion held him tightly, moved with him and found his own release.

The sound of the gymnasium door, slamming against the wall echoed through the exercise area and Alexander and Hephaistion parted quickly, looking to where the light shone in through the entrance to the baths. No footsteps were heard, no voices and they both laughed in relief and came together to kiss once more.

"You should have realised that Attalus would goad you," Hephaistion whispered, when they parted for air.

Alexander laughed. "I was angry that you were not there, I would have picked a fight with anyone that night."

"I heard that you were exiled, that you had gone to Illyria, and I worried for you. I can't tell you how many nights I lay awake and thought of you, how often I wanted to get to my horse and find you, my Alexander."

"My Hephaistion," sighed Alexander, resting his forehead against his love's.

They were still for a moment, taking pleasure from the nearness of each other.

"I want more than this," Alexander said, "I want you with me all the time."

Hephaistion hesitated. "Leandros quarrelled with Thoas before the wedding, then with Amyntas who he imagined had taken sides against him. That is why we went to our family estate. He brooded on the argument and decided he would go against our father's wishes, he said you were the better man. Then we heard that you had left and while we waited Amyntas arrived and Thoas apologised. Then all was well and nothing more has been said."

"You could still come, to be with me…"

Voices were heard, laughter, men were getting nearer. Alexander stepped back, picked up a towel, making out that he was drying himself as men from his father's guard arrived to wrestle with each other. Hephaistion dressed, then without looking to Alexander he made his way outside, there was no sign of him when Alexander followed his path.

OOXXOO

Alexander heard that Hephaistion had left with Amyntas and the rest five days later, having only managed to catch glimpses of him at a banquet and seeing him once in the hallway where he stood with Thoas and Pallas.

He had ridden out to their secret place when he could get away in the mornings, when he had no need to be on the practice ground or to eat breakfast with his father. Although he waited Hephaistion never came and though the disappointment cut deep he realised that Hephaistion would have good reasons for not being there.

It had always been the same, always stolen moments. He had a vivid memory of the first time Hephaistion came to court with his father, Amyntor. While Amyntas and Amyntor talked with his father he and Hephaistion had smiled to each other and then crept away from the hall to play together, forging a friendship that was possibly not supposed to happen.

When Amyntor had caught up with his wayward son Hephaistion had been beaten for leaving the hall, then beaten some more for his choice of companion, before Amyntor grabbed him by the arm and pulled him away. Alexander remembered that Hephaistion had looked back and smiled to him as he left.

It had been a while then before Hephaistion came back to court, two years to be exact. This time he remained by his father's side but Alexander noticed how Hephaistion was looking at him every time he looked in his direction and though they never spoke he recognised that something was between them.

After he had been sent to Mieza he absorbed himself in his studies, believing at one time that he loved Craterus, they became close friends for a while. Alexander laughed at the memory of returning to Pella, at fifteen, he had been reluctant to return, leaving his companions behind, then he saw Hephaistion and realised he felt no love for Craterus, that the feelings that he thought he had were surpassed by the overwhelming emotion he felt on seeing Amyntor's son once more. He had been mesmerised, he could not stop himself from staring and found himself planning ways that they could be alone, delighted to find Hephaistion at the stables one day and striking up a conversation.

Hephaistion's voice was soft, the friendship forged as children still there, as if they had been together a lifetime. He was easy to talk to, they shared the same ideals. Alexander found himself talking on philosophy, anxious to impress with what Aristotle had taught him, only to have Hephaistion laugh and reply to him as an equal. Such intelligence lay behind the lapis eyes. Drawn like a moth to the flame Alexander had moved closer, fearing to get burned, but Hephaistion did not stop him when he claimed a kiss, saying he always knew it would come to this.

OOXXOO

Letting go the regret of their missed opportunities, Alexander took time to write to his mother, letting her know that his half brother, Arrihadeus was to marry a Carian princess, telling her of his life at court, all the mundane things which had been happening, then wishing her health before he gave the letter to a servant to give to a messenger.

His favourite actor, Thettalus, had come to court and was due to perform that night so Alexander arrived early with Craterus and Ptolemy, to find Pallas standing before Philip, bowing low as he handed him a note, which the king read and then discarded.

Pallas would have walked by them but Craterus could not resist the urge to reach for him, grabbing him by the chiton and pulling him towards them, laughingly instructing Thoas' son to sit amongst them and calling for some wine. Perdiccas and Seleucus arrived with Philotas and Nicanor close behind them so Pallas' escape was blocked and he looked to Alexander who had become his only way to leave.

"So, tell us all the gossip from Aegae," Craterus urged him. "Does Amyntas have any more plots against the safety of the king?"

Ptolemy sighed. "You know Amyntas would not plan such a thing, Craterus. Careful your jests do not become rumours."

Craterus frowned at Ptolemy, thought for a moment then smiled. "Then tell us about your lover, Hephaistion. You must have some skill at rutting him, Pallas. I hear Cleitus' advances are regularly rejected."

Pallas looked Craterus in the eye. "He's getting married, to some girl from a good family at Aegae, I heard Leandros and my father talking about it. It will happen soon enough I think...so he will no longer be my lover...but we are both almost twenty and of an age when we should think to marry." Pallas blushed as he spoke, then looked down at the floor when he was done. "I have to go," he muttered.

Craterus would have kept him there for more fun but Alexander told Pallas to leave.

Thettalus strode in to the hall as if he were the king and launched in to his performance, a tragedy. Alexander sat and brooded on Pallas' news, that Hephaistion would wed, wondering why Hephaistion had never said anything, thinking what changes a wife would bring. He was almost twenty too, he had not thought to marry, he began to imagine that Hephaistion was growing tired of him, that his feelings were less than his own and perhaps he should marry too. He lifted up his head and looked across to Thettalus, thinking of the freedom the actor had, travelling where he pleased, the life might have suited him had he not been born a prince. He should perhaps marry to show Hephaistion he could do the same thing too.

An idea formed. He would marry the Carian princess and Thettalus could take his proposal for him, nobody need know until it was all agreed.

OOXXOO

Alexander dried himself from his bath, dismissing the last of his servants who had waited to attend him. He walked over to the balcony looking out in to the night sky, seeing the mountains of Aegae silhouetted against the midnight blue. He sighed to think of what the next few days would bring - his sister married, the games and then the army heading to Persia. He had nearly lost his chance to go and only recently had his father thawed towards him a little, though his friends had not been recalled from exile.

He turned away from the balcony and walked over to his bed, sitting down upon it while he discarded the towel, then lying back, letting his head rest on the pillow. He felt unsettled and could not understand why. Looking towards the balcony again he thought of Hephaistion being out there in Aegae, close to him. He had arrived too late to seek him out and then had been called to attend dinner with his father. Tomorrow he would see him and the world would feel right again.

Lifting himself to blow out the lamp he heard a noise from outside and reached for his dagger, getting to his feet and stepping away from his bed, looking to the lamp thinking he should have blown it out. He drew a breath, intending to call the guard, wondering how someone would get by and then he smiled, as Hephaistion appeared, lifting himself over the balcony, grinning at him for his success.

"Joy to you, Alexander," Hephaistion said, brushing down his chiton and stepping over to him to embrace him.

"You bring me joy," Alexander breathed, leaning in to the embrace, breathing in the wonderful scent that was Hephaistion's own. He twisted his fingers around Hephaistion's long, chestnut hair and lifted his head to stare in to the lapis eyes, losing himself in them once more, feeling breathless. "How did you get by my guard?"

Hephaistion grinned. "I live at Aegae. Remember? I know which rooms you use...and the guards assume nobody can climb to the balcony but I have tried it out a few times now, when I heard the wedding would be here." He smiled, then looked unsure, sensing something was wrong as he always could. "What is it?"

"I heard you were to marry. Have you?"

Laughing, Hephaistion threw back his head then pulled Alexander in to a tighter embrace before releasing him to look upon him. "Who told you that? I am not married, nor are there any plans for me to marry. Leandros said I might consider it and had a girl here in mind but there is no pressure for a marriage, after all Leandros has his wife and a son now, his wife had a son, back at the estate, he is the older brother and now he has someone to inherit." Hephaistion bit his lip as if to stop himself from laughing once more. "So that is why you chose to offer yourself to the Carian princess."

Alexander felt himself flushing. "You are my strength, Hephaistion. You light the way for me. With you by my side I see the path I wish to follow, you make me strong, make me believe that I can achieve anything."

Hephaistion leaned forward and claimed a brief kiss. "Less talking, Alexander," he smiled, before leaning forward again and deepening the kiss.

Yes, less talking. Alexander allowed himself to get lost in the kiss, holding Hephaistion closer, pulling at his clothing, wanting him so badly, wanting to make love and at the same time plead for him to never leave, to stay this time and let them face the world together. He was aware of Hephaistion unfastening his belt, unclipping his chiton and as they moved towards the bed, still kissing, that he was attempting to kick off his boots.

The mission failed and Hephaistion laughed as he had to break the kiss and deal with the unhelpful boots, throwing them across the room as they finally came off, leaving him naked. He fell back on to the bed, grinning, the lapis eyes openly studying the body before him, his arms opening as they fell in to an embrace once more.

Their shared passion was too great, it had been too long and they were too young to make the moment last, they both sought relief, finding it in the dance of their bodies, yielding to each other, murmuring words of love, both hungry for release. It did not always happen that way but this night they came together, clinging to each other and then laughing for the sheer joy of living, of loving and being loved in return.

"Stay. Be with me." The words were out of Alexander's mouth before he could stop himself. He had to wait for an answer, Hephaistion looked to him, studying his face as if he would never see him again.

"When the games are done."

Alexander thought he had misheard. He took a breath and held it. Hephasition had just told him he would be with him.

Laughing softly, Hephaistion reached up and twisted a golden curl around his finger. "You think you are the only one who hates it when we part? Though Leandros might well run me through with a dagger when he learns the truth...that I love you....my Alexander. He will definitely call me a traitor and remind me of my blood ties, of my duty to my family." Hephaistion smiled trying to hide the cost of his decision. "But I will be with you."

Alexander pulled him close, as if for the first time realising true cost of what he had been asking Hephaistion to give up all these years. He kissed him gently on the lips, thinking of his father who would laugh to know the truth, of his mother who would not be so happy, but she was in Epirus and he always thought more clearly when he was away from her. "Thank you," he murmured, wanting to say more but overwhelmed by the moment.

"After the games, I will tell Leandros when I can get him alone, I should tell Amyntas then but perhaps that will not be such a safe thing to do. I will write, perhaps, and then make sure I do not walk down any dark places alone."

"You will be with me," Alexander assured him, feeling a wave of realisation wash over him again. Hephaistion would be with him. "My friends will all defend you."

"Your friends are all in exile."

"Philotas is not."

Hephaistion said nothing, he just gave a wry smile.

"Then you just stay by my side, my guards will ensure that you are not harmed."

"Leandros might understand one day, he has quarrelled with Amyntas before, he might quarrel again," Hephaistion's voice held hope in it.

"You will be mine," Alexander breathed.

"I have always been yours," came the reply.

They kissed and then loved once more and Hephaistion slept a little in Alexander's arms before waking and saying he had to go, that he would try to return the following night if he could. Alexander had waited for him but he never came, he saw him during the day and understood. Amyntas was spending time with the Athenian ambassadors, acting the crown prince, and no doubt banqueting until the early hours, keeping Hephaistion by his side as all the ambassadors seemed enamoured with him, more so than Amyntas.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Alexander groaned when he woke up, lifting his arm to block out the sunlight that came to herald the dawn of another day. His sister's wedding had been well-celebrated, perhaps a little too well-celebrated, he couldn't even remember how he got to his bed last night.

Lifting his arm off his face he squinted at the brightness of the room and slowly raised himself so that he was sitting on the edge of his bed. A half drunk cup of wine was on the floor, he lifted it up and took a sip, to wet his mouth that was so dry.

One of his servants looked in to his room, then ducked out of sight when he realised he had been seen.

"I'm coming," Alexander murmured, lifting himself up, realising he was still wearing the same clothes as the day before.

A door opened and closed in the next room and Philotas could be heard asking if he was in his bath, the next moment he stepped in to the bedroom and laughed as he saw the state of his friend.

"You were well into your cups last night, my friend, "I thought I'd come and see how you were. When I left you here last night you were rambling on about being alone but not for long. You seemed amused by it, I was amused to see you that way, after I had the wisdom to decide just one cup would do."

Alexander rubbed his head. "There's nothing funny now, my head aches."

"Get bathed, get something to eat…"

"I couldn't."

"Get something to eat, I'll get the servants to fix a drink that works for me when I have drunk too much undiluted wine, you'll feel better. Good thing you're the prince here and a seat is secured in the theatre. We'll be late, you don't want to annoy your father so hurry up."

Alexander reached back and pulled a pillow from the bed, throwing it at Philotas, wanting him to be quiet. He made his way to his bath and allowed the servants to tend him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, thinking that soon he would have Hephaistion near, it had been so difficult yesterday to see him standing with Amyntas, that had made him drink and he knew he had been foolish to do so. He smiled to think of Hephaistion, imagining how life would be soon.

"Feeling better?" Philotas had come to the bathroom, taking a seat while sipping on a cup of wine.

"Not yet, but I will," Alexander smiled.

OOXXOO

Philotas had been right, the bath and some food, followed by the foul concotion that he had been made to drink had brought him back to some normality, stepping outside in to the bright sunlight had stopped him for a moment but as his eyes adjusted to the light he saw Hephaistion smiling to him, just for a moment and then he was gone in the crowds that were waiting to see the king.

Alexander was relieved that his father had been celebrating a little too hard and was late himself, his guard stood waiting for him, Pausanias looking anxious to be gone, even after all these years still acting with the arrogance he had when he had been the king's lover.

Smiling as his sister appeared, holding on to the arm of her new husband, looking to him as if she were already in love, he went over to her and embraced her, wishing her joy, wanting to talk a little more but their father arrived.

Clapping his hands, eager to be off, Philip leapt up on to the back of a waiting horse, held by Cleitus who grinned to the king before stepping back. Alexander smiled to his uncle and then went to find Bucephalus, he had forgotten what was planned, that his father should ride the small distance to the theatre, followed by his brother-in-law and his son – the two Alexanders.

Looking for Hephaistion, now from the vantage point of his stallion's back, Alexander failed to notice his sister come over to him until he felt a hand upon his leg.

"So who is this mystery lover?" She asked looking up to him and smiling.

"What lover?" Alexander replied, thinking he had said too much last night.

"You insisted on speaking to me, pulled me aside and said you were glad I had someone because you had someone too, a man, you were going to say more but Philotas came over and you signalled for me to keep quiet so I knew it was a secret you had been keeping." She smiled sweetly as she always did when she wanted something. "Who is he, Alexander? Were you looking for him just now?"

Alexander smiled down to her. "You are far too clever, you always were."

OOXXOO

Alexander's thoughts came back to the present, to the body of Darius lying at his feet. He shivered a little and wrapped his arms tightly around himself, looking out across the mountains, at the desolate place they had come to in their pursuit, far from the splendours the Great King had known.

Alexander looked down at the body of Darius, mesmerised by the dark hair, caught by the breeze and lifting as though there was still life in the man. He had not been strong enough, a man not made for battle who had run and it had brought him here, where was left to die alone.

Closing his eyes, Alexander's thoughts drifted back to the summers morning in Aegae and the day his father died.

The theatre was full, those people who had arrived too late, gathered outside to watch the procession of the Gods as some consolation for missing the athletes. They cheered his father on, calling out his name, cheering louder as they were acknowledged by their smiling king, revelling in the day that was all his.

The king was insistent he took the glory of his many victories alone, in front of all the ambassadors who had gathered, now witnessing the adoration of the man and of the wooden statue of him that arrived behind the gods.

Cleitus stepped up to hold the king's horse and Alexander dismounted and handed Bucephalus to a groom, smiling over to his uncle who was embracing Cleopatra as any groom who loves his wife might do.

Alexander went to his father and embraced him, concerned when he heard him dismissing his guard, he reached for his father's arm, intending to advise him not to be so foolhardy, but his father pulled free and turned to embrace Cleitus. Alexander saw Pausanius, standing at the entrance to the theatre, scowling over at his father, who was laughing and seemingly reluctant to let Cleitus go.

Looking through the tunnel, Alexander could see the people gathered there and his eyes found Hephaistion, sitting between Amyntas and Leandros with Pallas and Thoas seated right behind them. Thoas was leaning forward speaking to Amyntas who in turn leant forward to speak to some Athenian ambassadors he had no doubt been spending time with.

As his father moved to enter the theatre Alexander still watched Hephaistion, then he remembered Cleopatra was near and suddenly fearing she would see the person he was gazing on in adoration, he looked down, feeling his face flush. It took a few moments before he felt composed and lifted his head to find the world had changed.

The cheering from the theatre had gone, shouts and screams now filled the air. Alexander looked and saw his father on the ground, someone standing over him before sprinting away. Pausanias. Calling out for his father, Alexander ran in to the theatre, where some men were stepping forward but they held their place as they saw him, allowing him free access to kneel by his father.

"Father."

He was still alive but unable to speak, his body writhing in agony, in death throes. Alexander felt his hand held tightly as if his father was trying to take his strength, then Cleitus and Antipater appeared by his side, Cleitus shouting orders to the guard, reaching down to lift the king in his arms but it was too late. With a loud sigh the king died.

Looking down, along his father's body, Alexander saw the dagger buried in his side. He took the ornate hilt in his hand and pulled it free. He had managed to defend his father in the past, when a mutiny was threatened. His father had feigned death that day but this time he had been too late to help and his father was not acting. In a daze, Alexander looked on his father and reached to take a lifeless hand but Antipater and his uncle pulled him to his feet, Antipater asking Cleitus to reach for his father's gold crown that had fallen in to the dirt of the theatre.

Cleitus fetched the crown and handed it to Antipater who then placed it on Alexander's head, proclaiming him king. Alexander looked at the crowd, who stood in shock at what they had just witnessed, he searched for Hephaistion but could not see him. Antipater was calling the guard to surround them and then was guiding him away from the theatre, back to the palace. Alexander looked up at the statue of his father and wondered if he was with the gods now.

OOXXOO

In the cool and relative quiet of the palace Alexander was able to gather himself, to take in what had happened. There was blood on his hand and on his chiton which, if he doubted what he had just witnessed, brought him back to grim reality.

He took a cup of wine, which Antipater poured for him, and drank it down looking across the room to see Cleitus with his father's bodyguard. After a brief conversation Cleitus came over to him.

"Pausanias is dead," he informed him. "There was an accomplice, holding horses, who has escaped, we are hunting for him now. Pausanias stumbled on the root of an olive tree and was killed."

Alexander shook his head. "It would have been best if he was taken alive. How will we ever know if he acted alone or if someone paid him for the service."

"He had his reasons, I used to warn your father that promotion does not stop bitterness."

"He had more reason to take a dagger to Attalus than my father." Alexander took a deep breath. "Attalus must be dealt with..."

Cleitus looked at Antipater. "He is a threat."

"More likely the Persians paid him."

There was a silence. Philip was dead. The man who had gained so much, made something of nothing was gone.

"Where is Amyntas?" he asked, wanting to know where Hephaistion might be.

"I don't know," Antipater replied, "too many people were there to see clearly, too many people stunned by what had happened. He took a deep sigh.

Alexander looked up and realised how pale Antipater looked, then glanced to Cleitus and saw his shocked expression. "Both of you sit down, take some wine," he ordered, watching as the two generals responded to his command.

"I wish Pausanias had lived…death came too quickly for him," breathed Cleitus, taking a cup of wine from a servant and drinking it down before holding his cup up to be filled again.

"Attalus must be dealt with,"Antipater said.

"Sooner than later," Alexander said, nodding his head in agreement. He looked down at the blood upon his hand, closing his eyes and seeing his father on the ground, struggling to speak.

He opened his eyes, breaking the image and looked to Cleitus. "Find out where Amyntas is."

Cleitus nodded, appearing happy to have been given a task to complete, he got to his feet, finished the wine in his cup and strode out of the room.

"I won't be surprised if Amyntas has fled, Alexander. Either from the fear that he will be killed or to seize his chance to rule. You can't let him live."

"Antipater…there's something I have to say…"

Alexander's uncle entered the room, holding a bereft Cleopatra to him, in all of the confusion Alexander had forgotten her, guilt seized him and he stood and took Cleopatra from her husband and held her tightly in his arms, speaking soft words of comfort to her, nonsense, anything to calm her.

"How could he have killed him that way? It was meant to be his day of glory," Cleopatra sobbed. "Were the gods so angry that he placed his staute amongst theirs?"

"I don't think it was the gods, more the actions of men, who will be brought to justice."

Alexander guided her over to a couch and had her sit there happy to see his uncle go to her to offer further comfort.

More soldiers arrived with news or offering support to back Alexander as king. He spoke with them all, thanked them, he needed them now more than ever, he needed to show himself worthy of the gold crown he still wore on his head. Often he had clashed with his father, his father had accused him of wanting the crown too badly, and he had but now he just wanted his father to come striding in, booming out his orders as he always had.

In time Cleitus returned and reported that Amyntas had left Aegae, taking men with him, that he was heard calling them to come and fight for him, that he intended to take the crown.

Antipater shook his head. "The boy always was a fool."

"We should go after him before he gathers more men," Cleitus said.

"I'll get my armour, have someone bring Bucephalus to the gate, call up the vanguard, we'll travel fast and hope to stop any challenge before it begins," Alexander said, moving with the intention of preparing to leave but Antipater caught his arm.

"Leave the work to Cleitus or myself. You are best to stay at Aegae, use it as your base for now to assert your authority and make the throne your own."

It made sense, it all made sense, but Hephaistion, if he had gone with Amyntas, and he did appear to have gone, would be caught up in it all. If Amyntas was threatened then what remaining loyalty did Hephaistion have to his cousin? Would he put himself before Amyntas as his father had at Chaeronea? He had to defend him at all costs but to speak out now would make him seem like a lovesick child, not a man ready to lead.

"Just Amyntas, if he will not be captured. His companions…bring them to me unharmed."

Cleitus looked confused with the order.

"But, Alexander, they are men loyal to your cousin, they take the risks."

"Unharmed." Alexander said firmly.

Nodding his understanding Cleitus headed out of the room, calling to his men.

OOXXOO

His father's body was washed and then brought, ready for the pyre, to the temple where priests offered sacrifice to the gods and lamented loudly for the loss of such a king, then prayed to make Alexander worthy of the crown.

Alexander felt restless. He had ordered the death of Attalus, an easy task to be rid of such a thorn in his side. The assassin had been despatched quickly so that Attalus might not know of Philip's death. Parmenion was to be told first but Alexander knew he would not object, his father's favourite general would have loyalty to the son, and then his own son, Philotas, was still at Aegae, for now, soon he would let him go to his father so Parmenion could see how much he was trusted.

Messengers arrived daily from Cleitus who was still hunting Amyntas, all the usual places he might have been found were deserted and word came that he was recruiting in the north, possible trying to make for Pella but Cleitus was already dispatching men to stop him getting there.

All was happening around him, two cousins had to be killed, they could not be trusted to be loyal.

Alexander mourned for his father, called his friends back from exile and spoke with ambassadors and all the time he thought of Hephaistion waiting for the moment when he could follow Cleitus and lead the hunt for his cousin.

He waited two days until the pyre was lit and then he stood and watched as his father became smoke, flames, ash and fragmented bones. The ceremony was done and it was time for him to truly act like a king. He returned to the palace, had servants strap on his breastplate, give his sword and helmet and then made his way to where the vanguard now waited for him, the rest of the army, present at Aegae cheering him on. He raised his hand acknowledging their support and made his way towards Pella, intending to head to the mountains which rose to the west of the city where Cleitus had informed him Amyntas was heading.

He pushed Bucephalus in to a canter, anxious to be there, thankful to the gods that Amyntas had managed to keep out of sight for now.

OOXXOO

It was getting dark when they located Cleitus' camp, there had been a skirmish. Amyntas had been found and made the foolhardy decision to line up the men who followed him to do battle with Cleitus' troop, who were more experienced than the farmers and craftsmen which made up Amyntas' side.

Cleitus waited for Alexander to dismount, for a man to take Bucephalus and then led him down to where the fight had taken place, where the bodies of a hundred men or more lay side by side, waiting for their pyre.

Alexander swallowed back his fear that Hephaistion was amongst them. "I said just Amyntas."

Cleitus shook his head and sighed loudly before stepping over to a body which lay alone covered with a blanket. He pulled the blanket back. "Here is Amyntas. An arrow to the neck killed him. It was impossible to take him alone, we might have refused to fight but what would that have signalled? The surgeon is caring for the wounded, young Pallas is amongst them but not expected to live I hear."

Looking to where the mountains were silhouetted against the night sky Alexander said a prayer for Hephaistion's safety, for his safe return.

"Come on I'll take you to see our wounded," Cleitus said, breaking Alexander's thoughts.

"How many were lost?"

Cleitus grinned. "None. The farmers began to run the moment the archers in my troop fired their first arrows, the men of mine who did get hurt were the young idiots in the cavalry who decided to take on the men who were left. Amyntas fell at the first, the rest scattered then. No sense fighting for a dead man." With his words reminding him that the man he had always known as king was dead Cleitus faltered to a halt and they made their way to the surgeon's tents in silence.

Alexander spent time with the wounded men and then the men of Cleitus' troop who wanted to share with him stories from the battle, Alexander heard them but knew in his heart this had been no battle, more of a slaughter of those stupid enough to believe that Amyntas could be king one day.

He found Pallas but a fever had him in its grip and he was weakened already by the wounds he had received. Alexander sat beside him and took his hand hoping for a word about Hephaistion but it never came, Pallas died before the dawn.

OOXXOO

Alexander found a place to lie beside the fire and raised his arms behind him so that he could rest his head upon them as he gazed at the early morning sky.

Surely Hephaistion would have come to him if had truly wanted it but he had not, he had gone with Amyntas. Perhaps that was where his loyalties truly lay, with his cousin. Had he not been brought up to believe that Amyntas had the throne stolen from him? If he hunted for him in the mountains then there was a danger that his men might find him first. He could tell them that Hephaistion was his lover but these were dangerous times and any weakness could turn the army and a king loving someone who should be his enemy...

Turning to his side, Alexander stared at the fire and considered whether it would be best to go to Pella and send word to Antipater to join him there. If he truly wished to be with him then Hephaistion would join him there.

Closing his eyes he thought of the night at Aegae when Hephaistion had told him he would be with him. Hephaistion was not one to speak lightly of things like that. He would be with him...but Alexander had no idea why he was not with him now.

OOXXOO

By mid-day all the pyres had been lit. They broke camp and headed back to Pella. Cleitus rode up alongside Alexander, not saying too much but when a cavalry officer came up it was obvious that Cleitus had more interest in him for his looks than his abilities as a soldier.

"This is Leucus, one of the inexperienced bunch who rode into the thick of things when there was no need."

Leucus blushed and looked down, feigning interest in tidying his horse's mane until the colour of his face came back to normal. "I've learnt my lesson," he said, not daring to make eye contact with Alexander. "But I saw something that puzzled me."

Cleitus reached over and embraced the boy for a moment.

"I saw they had a prisoner with them, his hands tied and in the thick of battle."

Alexander reined in Bucephalus and looked to Leucus. "A prisoner?"

"The handsome one of Amyntas' companions...Hephaistion, I think that is his name, I bothered to find out once...when I first saw him."

Cleitus opened his mouth to speak but Alexander lifted his hand signalling for him to say nothing.

"Tell me all you saw, Leucus."

Leucus shrugged his shoulders. "That's all there was to tell, except that he was wounded, an arrow through his upper right arm, I think, it could have been his left. That's all I saw, I realised we had been foolhardy, I heard the horns calling us back."

Alexander brought Bucephalus to a halt. "He was trying to get to me."

"Who was?" Cleitus looked back along the line behind them, watching as everyone stood still.

"Hephaistion. He was tied...a prisoner of Amyntas."

Cleitus scratched his head and frowned. "So?"

"So we're going after them to rescue him."

Leaning forward Cleitus snatched Bucephalus' reins to stop his new king from doing anything foolhardy. "Why would he be trying to get to you? Why have we got to go racing in to the mountains to rescue someone who was taught from birth that Amyntas was to be given all his loyalty?"

Alexander looked in to Cleitus' black eyes. "Because we have been lovers these past four years."

Cleitus released the reins and sat up straight, staring at Alexander as though his hair had turned green. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again, then shook his head and laughed, looking skyward as if sharing the joke with the gods themselves. "By Zeus!" he exclaimed, then laughed some more.

"He was coming to me, after the games were done. He told me," Alexander said, wondering if Cleitus was the wisest person to have told the news to.

Cleitus grinned. "I never thought I would laugh so much so soon," he said. "Well, we better go rescue him, I suppose. We'll send out scouts to search, then spread out the remaining cavalry and archers in groups of ten or so, in close contact to cover more ground. If Hephaistion is wounded then there should be a blood trail or they will have to stop to bind it, it's a shame we have no dogs."

Nodding his agreement, Alexander turned towards the mountains while Cleitus shouted orders to his men. He felt a great relief to see the scouts head out at the gallop, to see the troop preparing to follow at speed. He was doing something that should bring him to Hephaistion.

There were places where men on the run might stop to gather supplies, to exchange horses for fresh ones but none of the small villages they stopped at had seen anything so it only left the mountains as the place they must have gone, they would have to cross them to get to safety, using shepherds well-worn paths.

As they came to a river in the foothills one of the groups reported finding a recent campsite. Alexander hurried over there, blood had been found on a rock and some discarded fabric. Sure enough they had had to stop to tend the wound. A small fire had been lit but the ashes were cold and tracks headed to the river, which they must have ridden along as nothing was seen directly on the other side.

Having the men quickly called back he then ordered that they split in to two groups, the scouts going ahead once more to search for the path they took to come out of the river, right and left the troop split up and Alexander hoped he had gone with the group that would find the fugitives and their prisoner.

"Three horses," Cleitus mumbled and spat in to the river. "Leandros, Thoas and Hephaistion, I'd wager. Hephaistion will slow them down, if they still have his hands tied and his horse being led." He brushed his dark hair back from his face and looked to Alexander. "Four years?" He laughed again and shook his head.

A shout went up. One of the scouts from the other group came galloping along the river. "They did not wait long, we have their path," he reported, as he pulled up sharply sending white water splashing all around him.

They formed again as one unit and then rode along a track and when that split in to two they halved again and when that new track split they parted again, until eight groups were out searching.

Cleitus had gone with another group so Alexander found himself with the company of Leucus and another eighteen men, happy to have their chance to make an impression on the king.

It was not much more than a narrow sheep track that they followed and as they rode up in to the mountains if became more difficult for the horses to make their way along. As the thought came to Alexander that it might be best to go on by foot they turned left in to a small clearing and found three abandoned horses grazing there.

Leucus drew his sword and looked to Alexander, who dismounted Bucephalus and walked over to Hephaistion's horse, inspecting both flanks and finding blood on the right side.

"Should we let the others know?" Leucus asked.

Alexander nodded, looking up to the sky which was going dark. The day had gone. Yet Leandros and Thoas would have to stop too. He looked up at the mountain and wondered how far away Hephaistion was.

"Have the horn sounded so they know. We'll make camp here tonight. Have four men ride back the way we came, I want Cleitus told to wait, there is no point having everyone climb this way but I want the surgeon brought here by dawn."

Leucus nodded and hurried to make sure the orders were carried out. Alexander looked at the blood and worried for Hephaistion.

OOXXOO

A fire had been made, food shared out and eaten, in the darkness no other lights were seen. Alexander had to fight the urge to go after them in the dark but he could not risk his men on the mountain that way.

He slept a little but kept waking, waiting for the dawn and he was the first to rise, placing more wood on the fire so the men might prepare a breakfast for themselves. Reaching for a skin of wine he drank a little down then sat and stared in to the flames, aware of the men waking and then hurrying to be ready to move. He smiled to see it, he was grateful for their loyalty and for their understanding, no doubt they all knew why this was so urgent.

The men despatched to locate the rest returned with the surgeon and the news that the rest of the troop were reassembled at the river but that Cleitus had insisted that twenty more men be sent.

The small clearing was hardly big enough to accomodate both men and horses but Alexander was grateful to Cleitus as he needed to leave a small group behind to watch the horses.

Anxious to be on his way and giving a nod to the surgeon, a man called Idas who was a good man to have around and fit enough to follow at speed, Alexander led the way. There was only one track to follow now and no way off it as the ground was too uneven with boulders littering the side.

At every turn Alexander hoped to find the men he sought, as the sun rose higher in the sky he began to wonder if they had stopped during the night. After a steep climb up they came to an open space and here was a discarded piece of blood-soaked cloth, drying in the sun and a torn chalmys discarded.

Idas took the cloth from Alexander. "Leucus says this Hephaistion has an arrow in his arm it can't have gone in to the muscle but through a vein or artery, he's losing a lot of blood and if he's expected to go climbing through these mountains with little rest and no food or water..." Idas shook his head. "The chances are he already has a fever, he'll be slowing them down."

Wiping his brow with his arm and looking up at the sun, now high up in the sky, Alexander saw an eagle flying just a little way above them. He prayed it was a sign from Zeus and looked around for the way onwards, leading the men again.

The path climbed steeply and then levelled out but there was another track which ran parallel, a little higher than the rest and so Alexander asked Leucus to follow this route with nine more men. They could see each other as they went, were in hearing distance too, both groups climbing across the rugged terrain.

As he was about to give his men a chance to catch their breath and drink some wine a shout went up from Leucus. Alexander began to climb the distance between them, aware of two men following, their swords already drawn. He pulled himself up the steep rockface, helped at the last by a hand from Leucus.

"Hephaistion is here...we found him," Leucus said.

Alexander looked to where Leucus pointed and saw Hephaistion, lying on the rocky ground, his head lifted and resting on a soldiers lap while another gave him water. He turned and looked back the way he had just come. "Idas!" he called, before making his way over.

OOXXOO

"We gave him water, he spoke a little but we couldn't understand," one of the scouts reported.

Nodding in reply, Alexander stayed crouched by the body of Darius, no longer seeing the Great King but Hephaistion. He too had been left to die alone, in a barren place, he had lain the same way. Alexander had been in time to do something then but too late now. He closed his eyes recalled it all again.

OOXXOO

Hephaistion was pale barely able to open his eyes, shivering as though he was struggling to keep warm despite the heat. His lapis eyes turned to gaze softly on Alexander and he opened his mouth to speak but no words came. His left cheek was bruised, his lip split. The rope that had bound him was still tied around his right wrist, though it had been cut to free him before he was abandoned.

Alexander took his right hand, gently holding it, his eyes looking to the arrow which was still there, it had gone through his arm and seemed to be held in place by strips of cloth bound tightly around the arm.

Looking around him, at the soldiers gathering around, Hephaistion swallowed and looked back. "Alexander...I tried..."

"I know," Alexander replied, relieved to see the surgeon make his way forward. He moved around to Hephaistion's left side allowing Idas to make an examination.

Idas called for a fire to be lit, searching out a soldier who must have been used to helping and calling what he needed from his bag. He looked at Alexander. "He has a fever as I thought he might, and this arrow needs to be removed, he must be in agony from it and though leaving it in place reduced the blood loss he has lost enough."

"But he will live?" Alexander held his breath, watching the surgeon look to Hephaistion once more before looking at him.

"If he had come for treatment straight from battle it would have been nothing to clean and cauterise the wound, bind it and send him on his way." He shook his head. "But to leave the arrow where it is, to trek through mountains when you are losing blood...it's brought a fever that we must ease, he should recover but it will take time."

"Ah....no," Hephaistion sighed, as if realising what the surgeon was about to do, trying to stop the surgeon as he untied the strip of cloth and carefully revealed the wound.

"It's not in the muscle," Idas noted to himself, then looked to Alexander. He took his bag from the soldier, looking inside it and bringing out a bottle of vinegar, a roll of cloth with surgical instruments stored in it and a small bottle which he opened and lifted to Hephaistion's lips encouraging him to drink. "For the fever," he said, looking to Alexander.

He handed a blade to the soldier who was assisting him, then took a moment to study the arrow, asking to borrow a dagger then cutting through the end of it.

Hephaistion gritted his teeth and moaned while it was cut through, reaching for Alexander's hand, as Philip had. Alexander looked down and closed his eyes, his father had died, it was all the same, but out of everyone and everything to lose Hephaistion would be too much. He lifted his head and looked in to the lapis eyes, speaking words he could no longer remember, anything to keep Hephaistion with him.

Idas wanted Hephaistion on his side. Alexander helped to support him, thankfully the surgeon was good at his work and pulled the arrow through quickly. Idas opened the bottle of vinegar and poured it sparingly into the wound on both sides, while Hephaistion clung to Alexander's hand, moaning softly, darkenss obviously pulling at him.

"Bring the blade," Idas ordered and the soldier returned holding the red hot blade and before Hephaistion could turn to see it he had cauterised the wound while assuring Alexander it was for the best when darkness finally claimed Hephaistion.

OOXXOO

Alexander picked men to carry on the hunt for Leandros and Thoas, to take them alive if possible. A litter was made and the remaining men carried Hephaistion down from the mountain to where they had left their horses.

Here he was given more medicine for the fever that had overwhelmed him now so he barely knew where he was or who was with him, he was calling to Leandros to come to him and then for Alexander, who stayed by his side through the night, barely sleeping.

The next morning they carried him again, to where Cleitus' camp was, beside the river. Here he was allowed to rest for a couple of days and the medicine began to work and eased the fever, Hephaistion ate some broth and his strength came back enough so he could talk a little, now he was, once again, aware of his surroundings.

There was a change in him. Alexander noticed that he seemed ashamed to have gone with Amyntas, as if he had no right now to expect any special treatment but more that he should be a prisoner, punished for his assumed betrayal. While the surgeon tended the wound, Alexander wandered down to the river, lost in thought of how to have things as they were, as they should be, then turned and went to find Cleitus, bringing him back to where Hephaistion now lay alone. He signalled for Cleitus to sit and then took his place next to Hephaistion's side.

"What happened, Hephaistion? From the moment my father was killed. What happened?"

Hephaistion took a deep breath, looked to Cleitus then up to the blue sky as if he saw the scene before him. "You know I planned to tell Leandros?"

"I know, I remember," Alexander said, softly.

"Amyntas decided we should leave, so I took Leandros' arm and told him I was going to stay. He laughed as if I had made a joke and went after Amyntas who was following Thoas as he pushed his way through the crowd towards the stables. Pallas was behind me, pushing me forward, not wanting to get left behind. I called to Leandros, I needed to tell him but it wasn't until we got to the stables that he heard me. I said it wasn't wise to go, that Amyntas was weak. Thoas heard me and came over questioning my loyalty, so I told them, I told them all, about us." Hephaistion lifted his hand up to his cheek and then to his lip. "I think it was Thoas that hit me, I was dazed, down on the ground while they argued what to do. They wanted to get away and as they couldn't decide they took me with them."

Alexander looked to Cleitus, if the general would accept that Hephaistion's loyalties were not with Amyntas then everyone else should accept it too. That was his reasoning, Cleitus saw things in black and white, he liked or disliked, agreed or disagreed, no half measures.

He looked down to see lapis eyes looking at him. "Go on."

"Leandros...I think he regretted not listening when I first spoke, but every man around was for Amyntas and he had to tread carefully. He wanted to protect me when the others wanted my death and all that he could to think was to offer me as a hostage if they were caught and outnumbered. Amyntas liked the idea, thinking he could fight and if he lost still get safe passage to the east." Hephaistion turned his head and looked to Cleitus. "He had no chance with you."

He looked back to Alexander. "After, Thoas told Leandros he had to run. My brother would surely have let me go then but I was wounded and as nobody knew about us, he took me with them. We kept on going, when all I wanted to do was come to you, my Alexander. I became a burden. Thoas urged Leandros to abandon me, it was a difficult choice for him, he cut the rope, I begged him to stay but he was torn. He wanted to make his way to safety and then send for his wife and child to join him."

"I see your loyalty is to Alexander...always has been," said Cleitus getting to his feet. "Get well, Hephaistion, I think Alexander's strength will come from you." With that he walked away.

Hephaistion smiled at Alexander. "I thought they would all think me a traitor."

"I know but it is not the case."

Hephaistion nodded.

"We'll go to Pella, when you are well enough to ride. There will be trouble, I will have to prov my worth."

"You are the king now," smiled Hephaistion, reaching up to caress Alexander's face. "King Alexander of Macedon," he laughed softly, "and perhaps the world."

Alexander laughed, leaning forward to claim a brief kiss. "Ah, but you know me too well," he sighed, deciding he wanted more and leaning forward again to deepen it.

OOXXOO

Riders approached and brought Alexander back in to the present. He stood and smiled to see it was Hephaistion's troop and that Hephaistion was riding over to him, alone.

Jumping down from his horse, Hephaistion took a moment to look at the body, hidden by the cloak, and to gaze around at the place where he had been left. Then lapis eyes looked to Alexander "We were too late." He studied the man before him and then pulled him in to a warm embrace.

"I thought of you," Alexander murmured, "and what I might have lost".

"I know," whispered Hephaistion, then, as if to ease the moment he laughed softly. "You always have the fastest horses, my troop had trouble matching the pace you set." He looked at the corpse. "I know how much you wanted to find Darius alive."

Alexander nodded. "Not so much as I needed to find you alive that day." He sighed. "I will send his body to his mother so that she might give him the funeral she wishes for him."

Hephaistion broke the embrace so it only seemed the act of friendship, not that of a lover. There would be another time when true comfort could be offered. He turned and looked around, frowning at the landscape, so unwelcoming and bleak. "We have come a long way."

"We have still a way to go."

Hephaistion smiled and bit his lip before he spoke softly, so only Alexander could hear. "I think often of our early time together, at Pella. Of the secret place we had, our meetings there. I never thought we would have this time, do so much, travel so far. And I know, even when you marry, as you must, that I will have your love as you have mine. You give me strength Alexander, you always have, right through the difficulties of having your friends accept me, the hatred of your mother..."

"I know the cost to you," Alexander said, firmly.

"And the cost to you. When they found Leandros...you pardoned him, let him keep the estate."

"Thoas was executed."

Hephaistion nodded and looked once more to Darius. "I might have died on that mountain if you had not found me."

Alexander reached up to caress the side of Hephaistion's face. "If you die, I die too."

"Then I must make sure I live...no matter how many battles you put me through." Hephaistion smiled and embraced Alexander once more, throwing his cloak around him, to share it. "You are cold Alexander. Come let us go make camp, eat, drink..and let me think of ways to warm you."

Alexander smiled, pressing himself close to his love and not caring who saw he kissed Hephaistion and for a moment he was back in that secret place, when love was young and they had everything before them.

THE END


End file.
